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! W, {- z: l' F8 CTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网0 U- K% m0 b) Q; ?
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: i, R, ?8 ~, c; f, q4 ~mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。. p9 l$ X* H& M8 ~* smso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第6 n9 e7 Y7 q/ C' X0 h
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：% Q; d( X" {9 f8 H
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。9 B* f( X2 y4 ]" Y# E4 u: w# r6 t
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：1 x9 o8 M4 S/ d
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$ ]0 d7 N# y; X# y! Xmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。& T S; N# G: Q, R ^! |1 _) J3 mcolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”, G* Y2 e$ Y( L# C. ?Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？5 F% @. P+ {& ~+ m
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# F! [7 Q k) u9 B3 i. amso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。, R+ q$ I6 m, M8 f0 X% J
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。3 ]& A) ` l) x0 ?- W( ]1 ?
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：! q3 G. {5 Q* ~% C6 P% |10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“9 L) o; B5 z; {$ o: |) s; ]
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。3 @) W a9 I0 n10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”2 E+ S6 L X+ Y5 {$ C* Z6 {7 Amso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
1 b- {& f& R& t: a- Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说： }- K8 s% O8 Z5 L: S
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。: x: i2 @' D# z/ S( N4 b- ?5 Zmso-font-kerning:0pt">"- _# J; C+ j- Q Q5 Afont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;6 x! E0 |- X; H; K) W" W2 L+ L6 |
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢6 A8 ^8 H7 W e h9 \; h8 \mso-font-kerning:0pt">?" 8 L* Q: j$ i2 s# m! Qfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;- `# y; F1 J0 `7 y6 T4 [0 f( r
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：) I3 T4 v% N* S7 q* I: w
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- W7 I7 b( R" Fmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。' q1 E6 P2 n% S& N& ymso-font-kerning:0pt">"
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- `' ^+ A! k2 K; i# gmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是0 u+ X' z" d x- R5 J/ O8 q; c
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; W) T& D0 U8 L! b0 ?2 |mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违9 I3 ~9 q \2 x+ G7 ^! m
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. P8 U. w3 O E' l5 [7 V: Mmso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得6 X8 n6 C0 h) n% c# Smso-font-kerning:0pt">“0 W+ O, I D) D- O6 r: _# Rfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;- y; c# \, Q' c5 a' Y& ], L
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违5 \; g2 w+ j" o5 c, L4 P; E r
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲: O; I ?% B) y: F# @# m
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，6 N4 ]/ N7 s# V: L4 ]! amso-font-kerning:0pt">“* D Z' q" a) c/ s5 P/ Efont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
* L* ?2 H E5 V$ L% {mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。$ B0 T4 h3 D) L' Mmso-font-kerning:0pt">”7 N' M1 o0 M% F+ M) S
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。" P3 S$ |6 l" t7 O2 T" ~! x" f
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7 C9 f( {: c9 a3 qmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？, Y, L) j2 a4 ]1 C10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义+ i a2 K' Z! S% Z. I e/ e. p
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！; @3 l+ L. @* D' v* Jmso-font-kerning:0pt">——' `0 I! Z. L" V q9 O& @font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;0 o' Q g6 @, v5 m" \; g' T
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。3 G! x7 @/ \- I' D- h4 lmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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1 v( b# J0 ]1 B+ I+ @: U: D, q9 ^Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述* k9 u6 w* A4 M2 P0 umso-font-kerning:0pt">2( |0 }: B# O- `: g& n0 Z1 Hfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;; a) R7 i) b/ [# F- d
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊9 a, Q$ o# C4 Z6 f9 V5 h+ b: rmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。1 j' X% u- k" Q& Pmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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孝经
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5 V, e# T2 x9 a7 {Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。& N& A, \" P; \* H9 d. w' imso-font-kerning:0pt">——) v# B. A2 C) p4 w* ?' q5 |* ?) lfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
# P+ b: v8 l/ Z( t; X7 \mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。/ K, W& q3 c, a8 O/ P! T, R. w- ?
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6 \& n7 [4 W+ Kmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：6 e0 K* y9 ?4 `2 @8 vmso-font-kerning:0pt">“8 T0 r2 g1 o R: f2 S% z& G
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。6 o p! W* \3 _; d5 t& B6 T+ Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">”: z1 q5 ?4 V! U! Z# k- S3 q/ Vfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;) Q' R; Y) a* K# ]4 e6 C* |
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个# S) z5 R' [! ` _- w
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; B w' |$ H6 w, a3 {mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬7 d: }5 k& K* I/ T" X% r
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为) ]9 U1 T( L+ F3 ^+ H( s! H
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道! u: C/ f8 b" _4 a9 |8 H7 ?mso-font-kerning:0pt">”* a% [& A- b) d& a7 t3 F0 Bfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
2 }. k, j; z t) p+ e4 imso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。' q3 Z9 `8 m, N* t
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! O0 Y; g( A( z% P+ v1 I7 HTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的, n4 m' {- t$ j, N- f
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思4 G' s! s" h! B8 R. c! S+ ?5 \
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