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Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网. ^* G7 ~5 R1 q2 v: a) I. Smso-font-kerning:0pt">QQ4 y( P! C7 D! b) v
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5 _$ z# U6 T& _8 z+ H+ X0 Mmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。2 r6 T& ]; A$ Q6 L5 xmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第. h( c1 ?& i x& j5 Amso-font-kerning:0pt">5" p. y# V/ O' d) E( }3 K
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) m% q* s3 Z/ ~mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：* o3 A8 v2 Z/ j5 B3 umso-font-kerning:0pt">“ _( U) l# J* o/ V: w1 e4 o& Q+ Z
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' n' ~/ ~8 D7 M. X7 K7 I/ Z) amso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。- J/ }4 V' S: z) U0 s& N" `
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+ t0 z8 X; w6 n6 X5 {mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：; z, B! D9 N4 Smso-font-kerning:0pt">“6 J5 i# Q# T5 f/ V) p7 g m
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9 W5 r: Y. P) M/ Z/ Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。5 {: b# e& Q2 u) l: N2 S
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：. d! f. ] q8 C" m) ^6 e7 tmso-font-kerning:0pt">“% r/ R* s& n( a# D( B1 M2 v1 lmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
! p1 K% I4 u/ I, r! t) r4 Gmso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？" L: Z" ?" R4 ^mso-font-kerning:0pt">”" j/ X( V& d& a5 K; R4 W1 b \mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;: Z: X7 L0 m2 k# y5 I( s
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& @3 l* {+ M# Rmso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。$ v* c/ G6 q4 S( V) ?" t% J; Ocolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。/ A/ R6 D! W0 A9 e! B, K1 Y3 v5 M: V
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：& h: Z* K1 F0 y3 }1 ?* U7 H! J10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“, f$ ]; n- A9 a$ v3 x6 A
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, B* Q* l: P% v# nmso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。4 u7 J2 w+ T+ x) m
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：6 @0 ]8 e$ t& q- F
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。) r7 O* s9 d7 y4 D7 Emso-font-kerning:0pt">"& U. D( T7 u# Y8 M8 S( g( N
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" Q- C" v$ C" Tmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢! K H4 S2 \5 f3 f, b
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：1 k+ @; v3 M6 O( g6 c
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( L& R; w" c: ?% N# u# ?8 w) lmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。- N% e, h5 @6 o+ G1 P) T) P _
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是! q' `5 \& ~3 ^$ n3 p10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“" ~# n: v1 A! A( k8 r4 m8 Ofont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
8 L. ?+ G, _3 b) ^! }) omso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违9 u; m' _! }' E% ~10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”" N# y3 q5 D# Qfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得- f. J9 L: n @mso-font-kerning:0pt">“, G0 o) Y) v9 t( ], gfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲# `) f# C) o/ xmso-font-kerning:0pt">“; c9 u* n. x' m" m! |3 G
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，5 l% P$ z0 \0 e; y7 f3 T# }3 S
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。9 N6 r, h# v9 T! P* @: Y9 N nmso-font-kerning:0pt">”; T" l2 {) B, B$ P! K
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。- G% M" `: K# w hmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？( Y1 D' [6 X% M! I& x
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。' u4 Y) P0 d/ u% G2 P# W
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义) j7 u$ _* O6 Q0 pmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！* m9 \2 y2 c: y- @mso-font-kerning:0pt">——1 X6 t* P4 x% r7 O" k4 @
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. ^4 F' `3 G3 l4 J5 Imso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。! j$ \ \. ?. @* V% r _4 B
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' A6 e9 U: v% D$ BTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述' }0 x" c8 W' w% k, P: o$ a% ?
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊2 Y* `! m0 P, }) R
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。/ G8 [( H- c$ C3 @" {$ S/ imso-font-kerning:0pt">
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孝经
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。+ G8 W" J- {2 Kmso-font-kerning:0pt">——+ ?+ Y2 p; _2 e
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。% k6 B1 Z2 P% f" U- nmso-font-kerning:0pt">——" d, R2 l( i0 i; Q) q6 |) G+ f6 k6 |
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* b3 M& _ S0 M% t- b5 m1 zmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：( l& \) d* _# q1 cmso-font-kerning:0pt">“+ L% n% C3 i9 y8 O
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。6 @) o" Y* P8 J0 E
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个 S4 D1 X7 \$ M3 B
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8 z6 D+ W* x+ Xmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬: I% g; A4 ~8 \
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为4 |/ W3 M- |1 H, [. wmso-font-kerning:0pt">“, n' A! U, ~4 p- G5 Ufont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
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/ D8 b$ J" ^& Qmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。! `4 E1 R/ \6 I, W+ z9 c* L$ imso-font-kerning:0pt">
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# A2 F1 q3 A8 MTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的' Q/ U% s# ]" Y+ p, z8 r; pmso-font-kerning:0pt">“- I" M) ]5 z# _! T$ [# h- v
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) M8 D% z* o/ L! Fmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思3 j; P' `) `, V) S0 T/ Z/ k0 L
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