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" S8 v# b! |. a Y$ b# \* ETahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网& E' W7 {- `( o: r0 O9 Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">QQ4 B- v8 [) W( P( f, `* ]. vfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
# F0 @! y* L% M2 v& p" nmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。& W* B# P9 G7 L6 R
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$ F2 c6 L. U$ A Q# Qmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第$ ^6 u, O- \2 o8 b+ Omso-font-kerning:0pt">5. F0 w. f" P' ]& b5 H' s
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# U+ b8 s! w: K% Z" T8 Zmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">章：/ S8 Y9 C. ]/ ] g! ^' y" I$ \mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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/ e0 `- b( b" S9 U. U4 @2 gmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰： c% C" }$ h! p
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; s/ G7 P% Z2 Rmso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。) z" y, e' y5 P" P- `2 x1 {/ A
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：6 n4 x! s9 g8 Q$ K
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! m( r8 s/ ~! l3 Q1 H5 l- a1 l' z$ d {6 bmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。7 s: N0 T% i8 i0 w% g0 F
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% v" a: ?" R& a- b+ Emso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：+ _6 H( P/ H; w: m! cmso-font-kerning:0pt">“% Q7 M# W7 l7 u' g2 F4 \/ k
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？% v0 ?9 c1 h1 n; l: mmso-font-kerning:0pt">”% h5 z) {: ]5 S) y, \! g# U0 V" @
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% Q! W* Y( s; s y$ ?% Jmso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：5 Y1 l5 I+ G1 |4 @$ Smso-font-kerning:0pt">“4 ^! }4 A/ H x, e$ P- F' {% p, d
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。2 A* S2 u, T) r5 }6 N% s" `color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”
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# ^2 G5 u; C) R8 i7 P$ Dmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。 a; t3 T6 |5 k& j$ n2 k* i# N K( tmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：2 `0 p0 i1 ?( {0 v
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; R! g: l* R& h4 emso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。: L& s# Y# f+ a! X. W
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：! d) r7 Q4 P( Q. {$ n7 ~: N0pt">"8 L+ o5 R4 {+ ?8 z5 P5 y
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% m/ e3 o% r. E4 u% e* OTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。3 A3 B% R& J4 o! Tmso-font-kerning:0pt">"3 I* ` D3 i* b& ~font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
5 ~3 z3 N0 v8 w Umso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：" n9 R8 y" D& l' ?1 J
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. v5 R$ ~: x1 |# l8 tmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢9 \6 n: g/ ^# x9 m2 Gmso-font-kerning:0pt">?" 9 c' C$ F v, F! M! [/ K6 Sfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
1 ~" R/ v: \) n' S! E* f z9 f( S1 Tmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：0 y( e" d* O5 d& g2 Q# B/ P0 [
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。+ p' i9 p( ]6 P0 }8 ^
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是" ~/ c: t- `+ ?4 \
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7 [& E1 G- x+ L1 Fmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违; r! n8 s5 e4 [8 @( T" z7 G M10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”& `% H& y- W) {7 j7 t, Nfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
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8 L: s# r* J" m* T( f: `/ Tmso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得0 A. q8 y! e- L% {% O( {
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违7 u' M( l- _! ^1 s3 V" d
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* [; g9 \( @/ i5 a9 X: cmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲8 f5 C- W- ?/ F3 ?' u" Nmso-font-kerning:0pt">“* T+ s) r7 d& s6 d
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- g7 S z& [( j: ^2 E4 qmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，4 [( O' w+ |5 X, O- Y+ d0 gmso-font-kerning:0pt">“! M2 D- [4 U- Y0 O0 @font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;2 T; f( ?, K- m* E4 H0 p! B5 G
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。* S; j. j% o8 H# [3 q E
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。 {. L- X9 r V4 j$ U" b4 q! n
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- y. |! T N6 f# ?! jmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？) U. _+ ?0 F* L( M) o
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7 |: f6 g( j" s/ e% G/ ]7 }mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。" W+ B: ]) u2 j8 D! v7 [& t
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义$ `4 C2 ~3 X& r! l
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6 w& \8 p3 A/ \" l9 L! W; v! H' lTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！0 e( R: ]) X* W) ?; J& K( lmso-font-kerning:0pt">——! a! m1 l9 S- g: Z" N tfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;2 h. g& T Y7 S+ c" j, @4 d
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。# a. w0 `0 [% K) T
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述5 K u4 @" A6 N( r
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊* G. C( [) t4 W- ~; U) Omso-font-kerning:0pt">
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' q5 Y) u$ _5 E7 i; i% ?7 ^Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。( f; D' z4 U8 }. c+ [7 z% K t; @
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孝经
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/ p" I/ l; _5 a! H& N, YTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。! V6 j6 }6 ]# V5 {9 q# Y/ h' H
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。& v% g! X3 M; X3 ?- s9 ]! J9 e2 T; wmso-font-kerning:0pt">——6 C# `/ ?7 d3 d. P0 F7 O( r
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; H8 ] M1 X X% y2 Y) qmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：2 R& J* y% Q2 o) G, u
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。% G! N; Z1 M8 ]
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" D1 h3 T+ h4 fmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个& e, Z* T3 n3 L* l& |
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5 [* P! v6 C9 T" s Tmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬: I( Q% z6 Q' t% h' h8 h! Lmso-font-kerning:0pt">”4 a( ^; q9 `9 X f& s- |6 k4 {
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为+ W0 M* D y9 {' c7 j5 H! e
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道+ v! |. S( ^- [7 \8 z& A# r
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。% | _1 K, d" N5 @0 g. {mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的1 W& L" Z, f" T! r9 Bmso-font-kerning:0pt">“8 {5 p$ J7 A# q; j7 @- }" `
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思6 O2 d) h6 k( N9 x& L6 z% \mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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