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; I; k$ w% C# K: \% vTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网" i0 M5 d; `4 I. t7 G2 Bmso-font-kerning:0pt">QQ) Z- J) x* U4 Y* R! y. |1 Nfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;9 N& O2 s3 ?/ |& ]
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。2 j- M. A& I+ Z9 X `7 [7 f( Pmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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+ q& `; Y: F5 ~+ J% M5 D8 lmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾陆英：% s9 a, w. l: S, b+ g/ K/ nmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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/ Y0 j1 Y1 g* ~/ O4 Jmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第; r; z" S7 B- S/ ^! j0 {% _( M8 q
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：- p z0 }8 _! d: p$ U8 f0 L4 \
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。" _9 E3 K7 s2 \+ M& c0 p/ wmso-font-kerning:0pt">”2 b. f4 M( L8 P O3 q5 J
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: x# u( v3 ?$ q- k1 Hmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：) Z, a0 D- T0 r. h. B3 c: N6 u
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- i9 K1 S. w6 T; O3 d; Z# z' lmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。! E4 k2 p3 c2 K; L4 dcolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”" T$ `% r6 P# N, A6 F# P, b7 k, Z
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# u @9 O f. w; |8 x, K% i: h& mmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：/ L$ i' ?8 z( r7 g2 B4 `( b# L3 vmso-font-kerning:0pt">“0 f5 V. H& n- B( A2 l/ r" X
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# W, ?, R8 D- e) ?8 j: Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。3 E$ [! |# B: {2 Xcolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。2 H3 f6 \0 h$ x f" \; tmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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5 @7 M+ k4 k* q; F9 l! j5 Q( ~7 Zmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：* d+ w4 s% C' j
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0 K( |8 \8 {$ y8 a9 bmso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。9 c+ Q9 I. B! g, p# t
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' C5 ] ~. H3 @, _' mmso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：( v: T, ^, p9 N/ a5 Y* W {! j0pt">"; D4 C" E& [( Q9 D0 _( K+ wmso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:
& Q+ Q. W5 c& D; l4 L4 u% M, D$ nTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。* U" z, M9 B3 v2 S6 F/ c9 s
mso-font-kerning:0pt">"! T. H- W& `1 `# Tfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
) x% X) h! A, i! u- z8 D \4 dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：+ F$ d9 P/ v/ n3 |mso-font-kerning:0pt">"/ m D$ b2 y/ A
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, ~! K0 ~- D t B( O1 hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢8 H" k u0 n( x# j% H% g# q+ a9 jmso-font-kerning:0pt">?" ' c6 S2 ^6 I& X: Q* H) I2 F4 E+ E8 @
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：) W6 f& Y2 [; e, imso-font-kerning:0pt">"4 N; e0 l8 |0 r4 b" Bfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
- x: w% K! d4 H+ i3 Jmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。& l% O% A! O# i4 Amso-font-kerning:0pt">"
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4 j/ q* U% V# C( d( Cmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是5 r; f3 L" c1 |2 p
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2 S4 B' e7 b; Ymso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违+ H& }8 Z; q3 |: T; Z3 A, W10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”- k# e) w$ Q& S6 {) Y/ `$ I
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% i5 ]2 n6 }8 D0 \" y! bmso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得4 |7 r9 G5 b n( C/ w9 Q
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$ J9 ^% ?, |2 w7 m; R6 i9 `5 v/ U8 smso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违) B% Z% U* V- X, _
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲" V% ]4 O |9 r- q1 S
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1 Y* O0 i, w& m+ x2 T5 ^mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，7 U- q+ [$ U/ _+ t ~2 Ymso-font-kerning:0pt">“% G/ [3 R: x/ [4 e, @2 i3 f$ efont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
3 I! x, j2 [& Y, ?. Y' G3 vmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。% ^( L I+ @0 g& ^5 y( Hmso-font-kerning:0pt">”9 G2 i; \" s2 W' |* F, Pfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
( j2 K% {; _6 @. b. Omso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。1 k) u9 c. b/ k0 J' @) P, i' ?mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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8 m9 j$ B6 u) O* V9 f0 V+ h9 L' ]mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？; _6 f9 c5 s5 A4 W$ I
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* u5 s) Q5 q, H0 kmso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。# j3 S5 F5 ]5 B) u% T
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">小风飕飕地：" T& A( }* R7 `5 U1 r3 D
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义' k8 \5 y1 X! C
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！2 J2 S0 ~% Z: J. n0 C
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。" [( H9 ^( |7 ]
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述, v+ C8 z' P x: o* q4 Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">29 D" s* A% s+ c9 v6 |( }font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
& r, i+ c. b7 D% m dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊5 k" H; P4 R" o4 Z
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" o3 J; v5 D6 QTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。3 M$ P3 T# g0 a" i$ \+ _2 v. g0 Bmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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孝经
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。3 \1 i' M8 S8 M* M" X
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。3 D [! c; s( i# t z& M& zmso-font-kerning:0pt">—— e9 B! @! Y) R' Nfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma; ]/ u: g: h: \2 q$ B
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：) S* R% [9 P* ~6 d* h3 ~( {
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。5 n: ]8 K) w3 X* s7 `
mso-font-kerning:0pt">” @1 Q/ J' ]& k' k& l& ~" J3 efont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
$ H) V7 v( F6 G( k* ymso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个( F5 B1 R7 s& Rmso-font-kerning:0pt">“5 i3 N# G: t; m. K2 P8 Z8 }3 x7 Q$ c
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; Y% E- l% K: Mmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为3 Y+ i% T2 C+ L2 F# z9 ]/ [mso-font-kerning:0pt">“, t: Q+ {( u* G5 c9 pfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;3 y7 t; L0 s* `& i4 ~/ O. E5 x8 m
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道4 _& f6 B" K* ^1 M
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6 _& o( _# b: @( ? _0 d. bmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。/ M8 V* Y4 Y% w3 m2 H7 z
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的# m& N! \2 t; [. U/ Q. v2 [
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8 G, v% L% N6 k3 L t2 |' pmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思3 G$ c' I h( B+ A" }' M" C. z8 u
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