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Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网" h. }. T' c' W3 e% jmso-font-kerning:0pt">QQ( h: _7 V6 I$ q. O# P% ]' @: Cfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
2 f6 J. [, r* z0 m$ V, Y4 _. W" pmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。/ t/ f+ x$ s$ C8 B% |mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第$ m# z# N* G/ h4 m
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. R6 A3 k8 {5 Y8 smso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：4 }( C) s- A7 m0 j2 D! i
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。8 h8 e' s, b" Q- `# |1 u( cmso-font-kerning:0pt">”( `, L6 M1 e: C% rmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
$ S% W8 k* {7 r- ~% S8 M5 l" `mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：# b T g: G2 R& c" m! c+ R1 A3 U
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。+ n, i8 ?' S; y
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4 ?- `4 d- x4 Fmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：0 U; {7 n _/ M. mmso-font-kerning:0pt">“+ s; ~ o8 Z% c! ]9 v
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？! V X& T* f5 A0 _) nmso-font-kerning:0pt">”) B- v/ H1 T. e1 c* k# z0 @" Omso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
5 |9 I/ Z# q2 Q9 {4 n. Wmso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：& v4 ^% q6 e2 d7 v8 @9 emso-font-kerning:0pt">“" X, K9 @5 f/ [( t" x5 I6 smso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
A7 l1 `# n- r& G5 } w( _mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。+ e3 T+ I+ G! `, @. o4 I# zcolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。. Y! q7 M$ l' o4 u5 Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：2 Y9 Y* d* Z4 K+ o& `* n10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“7 s8 M$ y7 ?1 ~, Q+ K( Dmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
9 s' v6 n! C" A! z8 z" M- Tmso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。7 ?) x3 n% c s" A6 c: b, i( Y4 w10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”- g* X1 R) R$ h. A9 L3 H& X( E
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说： F3 f# I5 M7 R& w0 z/ v* D8 V; E
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。; q% Y6 e$ W4 l: j" C5 A& n
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢* _& S7 ?6 V& o- D1 rmso-font-kerning:0pt">?" , Y* M: k/ Y; G" N
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" m6 S& F3 A, o4 b# ymso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。/ Q; y6 Y1 b1 ]* a. N( W7 E
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. z- K; i' p+ dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是# P/ C3 I8 I( @4 U) ?4 L1 ^$ a) ^
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. v* b% k9 s6 p& Imso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违- A9 D. q, R. T! ?3 b* b7 M7 O. d1 d5 _10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”, j$ X. s z' w! R3 I7 Lfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;" y3 M0 l! ^# N5 ~) P! I
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/ x# y7 M0 r6 v$ c2 b' f9 x" J; jmso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得- i% P5 V7 c5 w' ~* ~
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违" U- x- B% ]% t! a% Jmso-font-kerning:0pt">”* f* B" k/ |- i; J; j6 h
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲" Z/ C" x/ j( h& O0 U8 y
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，, B, g6 R# E+ ~9 C8 Jmso-font-kerning:0pt">“1 A+ V9 T8 A! @' z
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。$ ~7 D! q9 g' G, E- x1 I
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。6 [# c4 G7 Q% @$ Z" t* I; K
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？0 u& @9 _8 e s* N6 T2 e
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1 B' d" G& h* j2 w! g! umso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。! g+ J) ~5 o; Q+ j1 `, B, ~mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义' a) i) E4 ^9 L/ B( F& }% @1 f9 }
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！+ Y& b2 K: \( b( R3 w) I) w' S
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。. |4 Q( J5 } u& b
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述0 t5 a) s' ?' x( q, {+ X }mso-font-kerning:0pt">2/ r! ]8 f' p' m3 H" R: ~/ N0 x* kfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;( \% A! _; H/ q3 K# H$ O
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊 d8 `! V. l* Q
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* Y8 |% M5 Z; B; Z* `) mTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。3 E- O& F, f8 F* B1 P% q6 _
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孝经
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. s- u$ B! N! Z8 BTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。# B* H( {8 A. K0 q9 u0 Q- X0 r0 H
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8 @3 f) E6 L$ c4 \1 wmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。8 K1 j% ^! S2 v9 z1 t
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：2 M$ L4 B+ E0 {: Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">“# W6 U7 W, D* x/ `, }5 O0 Lfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;# a# {5 g" h- @+ O
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。/ e3 X/ {" g" smso-font-kerning:0pt">”4 ]. X5 R( u3 N( L
font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;/ ~4 D. P9 q! G. u, E+ h# {
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个! W* O6 u8 H: O* w, i: P
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& t m, {5 B+ P' s: V$ imso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬: M( D) X+ }2 I4 x) }mso-font-kerning:0pt">”; b! `& O) ]( y9 b: z+ {
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) m; k, e0 M: D1 S) w$ Q% \mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为, Z/ ?! f* c- x& t8 V% z& K! O
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道2 }- B9 I$ t3 p; G
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1 Z5 H6 R2 Z( @+ t3 x3 T) D+ v/ @9 omso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。+ K* A. B8 P, j& _# j
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的* Z: ]- `' w9 L- ~* z8 y0 s
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思. R# b; U' y# mmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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